Two Things.

Number One: Last Night

This I wrote last night, when I was crying myself to sleep, and I had a sudden realization, thanks to this lyric:

"WE COULD SIT AROUND AND CRY BUT, FRANKLY, YOU'RE NOT WORTH IT, ANYMORE."
-Mayday Parade.

-I've finally realized it's not much good fretting over him anymore. He's not worth my time. He's obviously moved on and is doing just fine without me. I guess-well I KNOW-I'm doing great, too. I have probably one of the sweetest most adorable guys ever. I'm doing quite well for someone like me. I've been stuck in teh past, holding on to hurtful memories... of him. HE didn't hur tme, but the relationship did. I'm so done crying over him, so finished thinking about him. Whatever it takes to forget him, I'm up for it. If I could, I'd erase those six months of my life. Because the memories hurt too much.
-He doesn't think about me like this, why should I be thinking about him at all? I am the one who had the control. I broke it off, I brought it back and had him in the palm of my hand. I guess I don't miss him, I miss having control of him.
-I have a great thing with Josh, and I refuse to ruin it. I love him, and would do almost anything for him. He'd do the same for me. I know it.

Number Two: New Semester

-Period One: Gym. Ugh. Hate.
-Period Two: Chem with Doc A. She's pretty cool, though it seems like there's going to be a lot of work in her class. She's kind of boring to listen to though, but all teachers are the first day.
-Period Three: ATP English with Kocur. Now he got me thinking:
--1. He said: "Good things happen to positive people."
--2. He said: "You are what you pretend to be, so be careful what you pretend to be, and how strong you pretend to be it."
--3. He asked us: "Do you consider yourself positive or negative?"
-I thought about it. And to number three I answered: "Both. I usually pretend to, or try to be positive around my friends and other people. But I'm very negative when I'm alone."
-I would like to try to be a positive person, and I pretend to be that all the time, so I guess eventaully it'll wear off onto my negative self, and I'll stop being so upset all the time. It's usually just at night.

-Period Four: Graphic Communications with Drav; oh my god he bored me to death. I'm not excited for 7 weeks of lectures either... BUT it's my only class with Josh, which is exciting :).